Right then – in part 1 and part 2 of this series I’ve looked at the pros and cons of delayed and instant gratification.

As Gaina suggests in the comments for Part 2, hitting the right balance is vital. Like most things in life, it’s going to one extreme or the other that brings problems (is there an exception to this rule?)

So, total delayed gratification thinking may well see you at the head of some vast commercial empire – but if your gratification comes only from moments of triumph and profit then it’s likely the rest of your life isn’t quite so satisfactory.

And when instant gratification is your default setting this also leads to an unsatisfying, empty and pointless existence – and you’ll probably not have much money either.

The Faulty Thinking of ‘Single’ Gratification

It’s pretty obvious from all this that finding that elusive balance is where it’s at. But even if you have a balance you are seriously limiting yourself if your mind is shackled by the either/or thinking that our culture so often pushes us towards.

This is the kind of faulty thinking that leads us to the assumption, for instance, that healthy food has to be ‘worthy’ and dull, while gorgeous comfort food has to be bad for you. We apply these polar assumptions to all aspects of our lives and society and mostly, we never have a clue that we are doing it.

The mindset here goes like this: if it’s good for you it’s no fun – and if it is fun it’s not good for you.

That’s why, if you read articles about the benefits of delayed gratification you’ll see words like ‘discipline’, ‘worthiness’ and ’self-control’ taking pride of place.

It’s all so ridiculously one-dimensional.

I’m not suggesting, by the way, that self-control and its buddies don’t have their place – of course they do – but they are not the whole story. In fact they are not even the best part of the story.

Introducing Double Gratification

This is a very simple idea, but one that I know flies straight past many people, creative or otherwise:

• When you are working for future reward, find ways of getting instant reward at the same time.

As Barry Green says in the excellent The Inner Game of Music:

If your life is precious to you, you will want your practice to be both enjoyable and musically rewarding

When you practise double gratification it means you are enjoying, really enjoying, activities that will pay dividends in your future – and when that occurs those empty instant gratification moments lose much of their temptation.

It Sounds Obvious

I know this may sound way too obvious, because actually it is obvious. And yet for some reason our tendency is to take it only so far. Sure there are activities that easily give you double gratification, but there will almost certainly be many more that you’ve accepted as either one or the other.

These are often peripheral to your core creative work, but hugely beneficial to it. You’ve probably unquestioningly accepted these as boring, hard, and un-enjoyable. They are the kind of activities that you already know would help you move forward in your own creative shtick. But even though you try sometimes, you never quite get it together enough to make a difference.

Here are some examples, but your own personal favourites might be quite different.

• Get fitter
• Work on your appearance
• Do some networking/go to events
• Catalogue your work
• Plan you time
• Work more regularly
• Go to bed earlier/get up earlier
• Source better materials
• Join a group
• Practise your artistic weaknesses

Now you may, at this point, be hearing a little negative voice telling you that it can’t be done – there is simply no way to find instant gratification in such banal activities. That’s your self-limiting belief speaking. It’ll encourage you not to bother, and it will give you all sorts of justifications as to why this can’t work for you.

Tell it to shut up, because it isn’t helping you. Tell it that you already know you improve with practise, and adopting double gratification is no different. Okay, so you might find it odd at first, but it’s all about finding the right groove for your thinking so that you automatically ask the question: how can I make this enjoyable?

Double Gratification Becomes a Philosophy of Daily Living

Gradually, with practice, double gratification can become ingrained into your way of life. It can become your first and best tactic to help get those difficult but ultimately rewarding tasks done, and it should be part of your planning when you are working out how to achieve your goals.

What does double gratification look like in practice?

More often than not it looks like fun. It’s all about finding, new imaginative ways of doing things so that they give reward now and in the future. Here are a couple of examples of typical delayed gratification tasks that can have an impact on our artistic abilities.

• Getting fitter

Most of us can benefit from getting fitter – and fitness can directly enhance our creative output by boosting energy and brain power. Unfortunately, much of the fitness industry seems to be stuck in the ‘no pain no gain’ mindset and while many creative people find gym work etc. intensely boring we often forget that there are lots of other forms of exercise that are fantastically stimulating and enjoyable.

The trick is to figure out what activities are great for you. For myself, it took me years to understand how much I love unstructured throwing, catching, chasing, dodging. I mean I really gain joy from these activities. So when I can get someone to play with me it’s great. And yes, I know I’m 54 – sometimes part of the battle is to release your thinking and your inhibitions. I’m still working on this and haven’t found a way of making it part of my routine exercise.

But I have made aerobic exercise to music one of my regular activities. Again, I seem to get most out of it when it’s relatively unstructured, intuitive and expressive. (Okay, it’s bouncing about to music – but it keeps me happy and exercising)

So I’ve discovered fitness activities that I love doing – you might want to think out of the box to discover what floats your boat – here are a few suggestions: dancing, cycling, wind-surfing, climbing, racquet sports, walking, skipping, boxing/martial arts, running a children’s football/hockey/basketball team.

• Strategic Thinking and Planning

If you want to make the most of your creative instincts, then in my opinion there has to be some element of strategic thinking and planning. Good thinking of this kind will dramatically enhance your creative abilities, your output and your creative career success.

But if your mind is clinging to the deadly image of dull and tedious delayed gratification, then the very idea of it can fill you with dread. There you are sitting alone – forcing yourself to endure a process that you know is good for you, but which you also know will be about as much fun as pulling teeth.

Now enter our hero – double gratification!

Yes, you are going to reap the rewards of strategic thinking and planning – and double yes – you are going to enjoy doing it.

How? Here are a few suggestions.

• Remember first that strategic thinking and planning should be every bit as creative as your own chosen creative shtick
• Make extravagant mind maps, including colour, pictures and the odd bit of daftness
• If you play an instrument, do your thinking to your own musical accompaniment
• Write your ideas on a wall – so, graffiti thinking. (Buy a cheap roll of wallpaper or lining paper to pin to the wall first)
• Invite some friends around and have a strategic thinking party.
• Get a friend to interview you about it (can be very powerful)

Don’t forget that it’s up to you to find your own routes towards creative, rewarding double gratification activities. Get into the habit of asking yourself that simple powerful question:

How can I make this enjoyable?

I know from my daily coaching experience just how much difference this can make for my clients – and there’s no reason why it can’t do the same for you. So practise finding those double gratification answers for all the delayed gratification tasks you’ve got used to putting off or failing at. Try it, and see your creative abilities blossom and your artistic success grow and grow.

If you enjoyed this article please vote for it on Stumbleupon by clicking the button below. Thank you.

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Other posts:
- Delayed Gratification and the Creative Soul – Part 1: Delayed Gratification is Good For You
- Are False Priorities Blocking Your Creativity?

Okay – so you read (I hope) the case for incorporating a delayed gratification approach into your creative life – now, for the first time anywhere (so far as I know), here is the case against – or:

Why Instant Gratification Rules
Note: I’m taking a devil’s advocate stance here so don’t expect any kind of balanced argument.

Delayed gratification can be a real creativity killer. If you’ve ever seen the kind of person who has truly embraced delayed gratification you’ll know exactly what I mean.

This is the kind of person who plans to marry their partner in 7 years time. They actually set a date. It’s dull, dull, dull accountant-think where everything is subjugated to the hallowed dogma of future profit.

When you are deep in the delayed gratification groove it becomes a cop out from the terrifying, exhilarating joy of living in the here and now. It’s safe, uneventful and smug, and you can look down on your lesser life forms secure in the knowledge that you will end up in a bigger house, with a better car and a wonderful 2.5 children family. And when the time comes you will know exactly when to stop delaying your gratification and begin to enjoy – really enjoy – all the accumulated fruits of your dutiful toil.

Yeah… right. As if.

The awkward truth is that delayed gratification is a habit that’s hard to give up. The grim puritan soul of delayed gratification feeds on the consistent denial of the good things on offer at this moment – to the point where denial itself becomes the reward.

Well stuff that!

How can you be creative when you hold back from the spontaneity of now? How can you be original when your imagination (if you can call it that) is fixed within the rigid tram-lines of your ever-so-conventional future vision?

If you want to find and keep your creativity you need to party. And every now and again you need to really party. You need to feed your creativity with unplanned indulgence and planned stimulation. You need the ability to drop everything when your friends need you to – to cry with them, laugh with them, bitch with them.

You need the time to gaze at the stars, to become fascinated by the wrinkles on an old man’s face, or awed by the perfect lacework of a dragonfly’s wing. And you need to be idle enough to allow your thoughts and ideas to come together at their own pace.

Our creative soul needs everything that a life dedicated to the god of delayed gratification denies. If we want to be creative we should deny its false promise.

If you enjoyed this article please vote for it on Stumbleupon by clicking the button below. Thank you.

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Other relevant posts:
Delayed Gratification and the Creative Soul – Part 1: Delayed Gratification is Good For You
Delayed Gratification and the Creative Soul – Part 3: Why Double Gratification is Best

Have you ever given up something pleasurable now in order to reap greater rewards later? That’s delayed gratification. And I’ll bet you’ve also decided to blow the consequences and take the pleasure now. That’s instant gratification.

In this post I’m going to present the standard arguments for delayed gratification and against instant gratification. Then in the posts that follow I’ll look at whether anything is ever quite so simple.

The Importance of a Marshmallow

There was a remarkable study using children’s (in)ability to resist a marshmallow that had some amazing results. Psychologists gave some lucky four-year olds a marshmallow. Then they told the child that they could eat it straight away – or save it for twenty minutes and be rewarded with a second marshmallow.

Of course some kids scoffed the marshmallow immediately, some tried to resist the temptation but gave in, and some others actually managed to hold out for their prize – though not without agonies of squirming, shall-I-shan’t-I temptation. It must have been superbly entertaining for the experimenters.

Anyhow – the point of this beautifully designed torture was to follow the kids as they grew and developed, and find out if there was a link between the early ability to delay gratification and how well or badly these children did in later life. There have been many similar studies and the correlations are astonishing – consistently showing that those tending towards instant gratification did worse than those who managed to hold out for that extra marshmallow, bigger candy bar or extra dollar (depending on the experiment).

And the delayed gratification kids do better over a range of measurements – from better school results, improved relationships, higher incomes and more reported happiness. They’re also less likely to have problems with stuff like drink and drugs.

Narrow Definition of Success

So the results are pretty compelling – though it’s worth noting that much of the personal development literature available assumes a very narrow definition of success that basically means things like traditional career, position and salary. Nothing wrong with that, but not necessarily the drivers for the dedicated creative soul – though we might easily argue that there are equivalent desires for success in the arts, writing, music, etc.

Denied Gratification?

Because delayed gratification is more complex than the experiments assume (it’s rarely one marshmallow now for two later in real life), there’s a sense in which the trade seems much more like denied gratification. It seems to be life’s little luxuries that lose out – it’s the late nights, the extra drink, the burger or the full fat French cheese, the latest whizz-bang gadgets or being seduced by the current TV fad.
And it makes you wonder – aren’t those delayed gratification types just so deadly dull? Can’t they just lighten up and enjoy the moment?

Well – yes they can – it’s just that unlike those under the spell of instant gratification they get to choose: some gratification now, or more later. Delayed gratification is not denied gratification, it’s a trade off where the trade is to your advantage.

‘Empty’ and ‘Negative’ Gratification

There’s also another little detail that’s worth mentioning – and that is that much of the instant temptation we succumb to is ‘empty’ – it’s passive, temporary and actually makes us feel worse about ourselves afterwards. In fact in terms of achieving growth and success, and in terms of maintaining health and vitality there are often all too clear negative impacts to instant gratification.

But the trouble is that in our western culture almost every waking moment is bombarded with messages selling instant gratification. Most of our advertising is based on it. Buy this car, TV, cosmetic, perfume, music, drink, burger and not only do you get the product, you also magically receive an aura of ’success’ that the adverts tell you come with it – irresistible charm, affluence, exotic and exciting lifestyles, amazing skills, happy families… did I miss anything? Of course. Lots of sex.

So we buy – we feel the promised magical properties rubbing on to us, feel the rush of pleasure and triumph – and then a couple of days later, when the magic has worn off again, feel the need for another consumerist hit.

Rich Thinking and Poor Thinking

No wonder some experts liken delayed and instant gratification to ‘rich’ thinking and ‘poor’ thinking. Guess which is which.

How to Make Delayed Gratification Easier

According to many pundits exercising delayed gratification is all about self-control, discipline and willpower. There’s a certain moralistic tint goes with this argument, a judgement that the delayed gratification type is somehow ‘better’. That’s ridiculous. More effective perhaps, but then so were Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot. Effectiveness does not make you a better person, and neither does delayed gratification.

Self-control, discipline and willpower do help, but I believe there’s another factor that is way more important – the ability to visualize the outcomes of your chosen actions. When we can see only the instant rewards it’s no contest.

But a vivid awareness of the fuller impacts of our choices not only makes the negative outcomes of instant gratification more real, it does the same for those far-away positive outcomes of delayed gratification. And that makes it much, much easier to do the right thing.

Years back, when I was a college English Lecturer, I learned the value of this kind of visualization for my students. So when I set work for them I would also explain the tangible benefit to them of doing the work – namely, better marks in a particular exam paper, and the positive feeling of actually tackling questions in those papers that they would be baffled by otherwise. When I got the visualization right, even the most distracted of students could muster the enthusiasm to do a little more work.

Set compelling goals.

Of course, you can only visualize success if you’ve figured out what it is you want to succeed at. So taking the time to set yourself some worthwhile goals is absolutely paramount. With no future vision of success, no goals, what’s the point in delaying gratification? Well, there is no point. But find a compelling and realistic set of goals and build a vivid understanding of the rewards and benefits of achievement and you have the vital ingredients for pain free delayed gratification.

So the next time you are faced with the tempting, oh-so-immediately-satisfying, oh-so-temporary hit of instant gratification, remember that what you may be giving up is more, longer lasting and better gratification, later.

***

See also:
Organic Goal Setting
Delayed Gratification and the Creative Soul – Part 2: the Case Against
Delayed Gratification and the Creative Soul – Part 3: Why Double Gratification is Best

Well, earlier this week I wrote a post entitled Creativity and Depression. A comment by Sari offered the other perspective on the subject. Among a number of interesting points Sari argued that media presentation and our own willingness (as creative people) to express ourselves skewed the perception towards that of the suffering artist. I’ve paraphrased heavily here, so Sari, I hope I’ve not misrepresented your stance.

The Creative Instinct Blog is all about achieving the joy and fulfilment that expressing creativity brings – but the focus does tend to be about the barriers and blocks that get in the way, and how to overcome them.

In fact the book I discussed in my previous post, The Van Gogh Blues, also argues that creative expression brings joy and meaning to our lives – it’s just that too many of us find our path to expression blocked.

That doesn’t always mean lots of suffering or depression- if family work and other interests are also meaningful. Many years ago (back in the late 70s!) I met many people who exemplified this. For a couple of years I worked as an ‘insurance man’. My job was to visit people in their homes to collect their insurance premiums and theoretically, sell them more insurance too. I was a young man and not a great insurance man. I never did sell enough new insurance and as I’ve always been fascinated by people my conversations with my customers often slowed collections down.

Senior Creatives

I found one type of customer was particularly interesting – the retired person who finally had chance to embrace their creativity. Most of them were painters – and very conventional painters at that – but wow, did they get joy from their art. These were men and women in the suburbs of Rotherham, an uncompromising steel and mining town (now ex-steel and mining) in Yorkshire, UK.

These happy people didn’t express regret at not being creative during their working life – just pride, enjoyment, enthusiasm and gratefulness. When I taught creative writing some years later I saw the same thing.

I suppose one frustration I felt on their behalf was that starting so late made it difficult for them to truly develop their undoubted abilities. That-s why I like to emphasise the need to use your creativity now, if you can. Paradoxically though, you might argue that beginning your creative life early and then being blocked by your other roles in life could be more frustrating (and depressing) than making a decision to leave your creativity for later in life.

Danger of Explosion

Well, I know that some people can put it to one side because I’ve met them – but many others simply can’t live with that. I’m one of them and so is my wife, Lynda. We both left school early and without any real ambitions to be creative, but as we grew into our twenties so did our creative needs. Eventually it wasn’t to be denied and if we hadn’t found an outlet for our creativity we’d have exploded.

Anyway, the point I’m making is that, as Sari points out – we should never forget that the personal outcome of expressing our creativity is joyful and wonderful, and we should tell that story too.

The Good Life is Boring?

Of course, another reason for the suffering artist image is our choice of creative subject matter: happiness and joy, fulfilment, a life of deep contentment and peace… yeah right… as if.  All that stuff is awesome to experience but often stupifyingly uninteresting to an audience – and more often than not it’s uninteresting to the creative practitioner too.

Lynda’s sculptures from a few years back are a good example – quite disturbing, even though Lynda herself has a marvellously sunny outlook on life. What she felt driven to express at that time came from the darker nooks and crannies of her soul and were always a surprise to those who thought they knew her. Conversely, for Lynda herself the expression of such dark material was the source of much joy and fulfilment.

It’s a complex relationship – but I guess the message comes back to Sari’s alternative perspective and the question – why are creatives so unbelievably happy & joyful & sane & optimistic?

Are we?

Stop Press – Creativity and Joyfulness!

It’s just turned 7am and I have this moment heard that my daughter has given birth to our second grandchild and first granddaughter! Mother and baby are doing fine. The labour was so quick that our son-in-law, Andy, made the delivery. What a rare privilege.

So how about that for Creativity and Joyfulness? And now we are off to see our new granddaughter!

One of the things that gives we creative people endless anguish is the nagging worry about our own talent. Do we have enough of it? Have others been blessed with more? Is it fair?
Well – here’s a hard truth. It’s a near certainty that there are other creatives out there, artists, musicians, photographers, writers (you name it), with more talent than you and me. You know what? It doesn’t matter. If you are driven to be creative it just doesn’t matter at all.

Fact is – it’s not about how much or how little talent we have – it’s about what we do with it.

What’s at least as important as the amount of talent is your attitude to that talent, and the attitude you have about yourself.

Worrying about your own innate abilities can only ever be counter productive. You’ve got what you’ve got and there’s no point in wasting your precious psychic energy on comparisons or regrets. That’s especially true when you factor in that most of us underestimate our own abilities and overestimate the abilities of others.

Act as if you had talent – and act as if you hadn’t!

Yes you did read that right. To get the most out of your creative talent you need to act is if you had it and act as if you hadn’t. Not so difficult once you realise that there’s no difference whatsoever.

Here are some descriptions of the ways that ‘talented’ people might behave, followed by descriptions of the ‘less talented’ alternatives.

Talented People Behave Like This:

• Talented, but with Bad Inner Critic –
  • Doesn’t believe in themselves or their talent
  • Focuses on the negatives
  • Sees every fault and flaw as further evidence of failure and lack of ability
  • Suffers huge internal resistance and tension to starting their art
  • Doesn’t enjoy their creative process or output
  • Will often give up and do something else

• Talented but deluded –
  • Believes that their supreme talent is flawless and complete
  • Enjoys the process and output but can’t understand why other people don’t
  • Is blind to the possibility of faults or flaws and so can never address them
  • Will often give up and do something else

• Talented and with a Good Inner Critic –
  • Understands the need for courage and practice to make the most of what they have
  • Picks out areas for development and works on them
  • Maintains a conviction that intelligence and focus will enhance the talent they have
  • Views mistakes as opportunities for learning
  • Finds long term enjoyment in the creative process and output
  • Achieves fantastically well

Less Talented People Behave Like This:

I can’t see any point in reprinting what’s above. Please re-read the bullet points again but replace ‘talented’ with ‘less talented’.

Remember – It’s not about what talent you’ve got – it’s about what you do with it.

That being the case, you owe it to yourself to do the best you can. And the best way to do that is by making friends with your Good Inner Critic and by embracing healthy self criticism as a path towards satisfaction, improvement and success.
You have all the talent you need.

***

Other relevant posts

Do You Have the Creative X Factor?
Achievement Envy – Be Inspired or Be Crushed by the Creative Success of Others. ]]> http://www.thecreativeinstinct.com/2007/12/04/stop-worrying-about-talent/feed/ 2