I’m having trouble writing my next posting for The Creative Instinct.

I’ve been trying to produce my second article about the power of small gifts – about gifts to and from others. It’s a lovely, juicy topic that’s got my head fizzing with ideas that simply refuse to settle down and let me write them.

Here’s were I think the problem is: I’m trying to write before my brain is ready to write. And I’m doing that because of the self-imposed pressure of posting to the blog on a regular basis.

Well, if I’ve learned anything about my own creative process it’s that my brain ain’t going to co-operate unless it’s had enough digestion time. And this subject just keeps opening up and opening up to reveal a breadth and complexity that I’d not previously recognised.

Trying to compose and martial my creativity in such situations is bonkers – but I guess most of us try anyhow when the pressure to produce demands it. In this case the resultant writing has been painfully laboured and trite until it finally dawned on me that I’ve been forcing the process.

It Feels Like a Block

The trouble is that until you do understand what’s going on it feels like a genuine writers’ block. It’s easy to panic and keep battering away in a desperate attempt to bash our way through. It’s times like this that lead to those familiar images of the tortured artist and writer.

But brute force of mind is rarely the answer.

Especially when, like now for me, the subject I’m trying to write has revealed itself to have much more to it. I need to step back, take a pause, and stop trying to write a book in a thousand words.

I need to remind myself that I don’t need to write everything that’s in my head (or in my notes).� I need to remember that I can’t write with clarity if I haven’t achieved clarity.

My Good Inner Critic

It would be easy to beat myself up about this, easy to let my bad inner critic’s destructive voice run wild. Heaven knows that’s happened often enough in the past.

But my good inner critic is strong these days. He’s telling me that this is a subject worth the extra thinking. And he’s politely pointing out that I’ve been pre-occupied with another project, developing a part of my life coaching website and grappling with the mysteries of Google Adsense.

So the result for me is stangely positive. I haven’t been able to produce the writing I wanted, and yet, right now at this moment of writing about not writing I feel wonderfully assured, calm and serene. I feel great.

I wish you all the joy of creativity.

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Other relevant posts:
Visualise Your Creative Block or Writers� Block
Are False Priorities Blocking Your Creativity?
Creative Blockages – 7 Killers of our Artistic and Creative Potential

My head’s in a spin. I just came across the following quote from the great psychologist Abraham Maslow:

A first rate soup is more creative than a second rate painting.

Is it?

There are all sorts of ways of looking at this. I guess that certainly the original creation of a ‘first rate’ soup is a very creative act – but what about when you’ve got it down to a fine art (see what I did there?)

Creativity in a Savoury Crust?

Is that more creative? I’m going to use my own culinary masterpiece as an example: my hand crafted turkey pies – a slightly healthier version of an English pork pie – that is, with a hot water pastry crust, and a meat and jelly filling. I’ve been making these pies for 20 years or so – rarely change the recipe but have gradually refined my techniques. I take great pride in my pies and I hope that they are first rate.

Note: tragically and inexplicably I don’t have a photo of one of my pies. Entirely for the purposes of this blog I’ll bake one soon so that you can see (if not taste) one in all its glory.

But is my first rate pie more ‘creative’ than a ’second rate’ painting? Here’s what I think – ‘ NO! And not only that, it-s not even more creative than a ’second rate’ pie, or soup, that has been made creatively but hasn’t worked out properly.

Cobblers

In fact the whole idea that something ‘first rate’ (whatever that means) is necessarily more creative than something ’second rate’ is in my humble view a right load of old cobblers.

First of all there’s the thorny judgement of what is first or second rate. But more important is the question of whether someone at the height of proficiency in their own artistic sphere (I”m including cooking in that) is being ‘more creative’ than someone who is setting out on the journey.

And as I’ve said in other posts, making mistakes is all part of the creative process. Do we have to wait until we get it right before we can say to ourselves – now that’s creative? That sounds to me like a great recipe for stifling our joy and freedom to make creative cock-ups, and it adds unwanted judgement about the quality of our creative acts.

So – second rate paintings versus first rate soups and pies?

Here’s a thought: maybe that great 20^th century psychologist Abraham Maslow was simply a rubbish painter but first rate at making soup.

Yes – I’ll go for that.

This is a very personal posting.

It’s ironic that only a few weeks after celebrating The Creative Instinct first birthday – and looking forward to the continued growth and development over the next year – I’ve been really struggling to keep on blogging.

If you’re a regular reader you may have noticed a drop in posting frequency over these last few weeks. This is because my wife Lynda’s ongoing health issues gifted her a nasty flare-up mid-February which saw her in hospital for a while. She’s now been back home for over a month and is still crazily weak and still in way too much pain.

Even before February Lynda’s creative artwork had petered out because of the demands and discomforts her health was putting on her. Since her flare-up there’ve been a lot of very unsettling mental readjustments for the both of us. And for myself the pressures of looking after Lynda, running the home and keeping my coaching business going has taken all my energy and attention.

Therapeutic Creativity

There’s no doubt that focussing on your creativity can be hugely beneficial during certain periods of illness. The power of being absorbed by something other than your health, and the rewards of achievement have certainly helped Lynda through difficult times.

One friend and colleague of mine set herself some tough creative goals at a time when she was struggling to manage a chronic illness. She developed her style and produced more work of a higher standard than she’d ever managed before. The satisfaction she gained during that difficult time was priceless.

Sad to say that her symptoms worsened to the point where even she couldn’t continue. Three years on and she’s still battling, but her creativity has been battered and, for now at least, subdued. [Good new update! See the link at the end of this post]

This is what’s happening to Lynda just now. Her health is never better than fragile but her spirit is perhaps best described as defiant. So when she’s well enough she makes her art and when she’s not she spends a fair amount of her time thinking about her art.

But periods like this current one can last months and are a different matter entirely. A couple of days ago Lynda confided in me that at the moment she feels no attraction or desire towards exercising her usual creativity.

Who Am I?

Such a change in focus brings up unsettling questions for any person in this situation, one of which is who am I? When your whole self image is wrapped around a core of being creative, and that creativity is absent, this becomes a big question – not least because you probably have no idea when, or if, your creative core will flicker back into life. I guess that when you’re very ill this is the least of your concerns. But as you get a little better the loss of the creative urge becomes more apparent.

From Lynda’s previous experiences of these periods we expect that her creativity will reassert itself as her health problems ease. But there’s always doubt.

My Own Creativity

As the partner of someone who is ill the pattern has been slightly different. Certainly there were a few weeks where my creative instinct was blasted out of the water – from the obvious concern of seeing your loved one in serious distress (and the emotional turmoil and uncertainty that is part of that), and from the sheer time pressures of added activity in such unwelcome situations.

But then as the dust began to settle a little I still wasn’t able to find the time or mental space for my own creativity. Now, six weeks or so on from Lynda’s sudden flare-up my head is just starting to clear and only now do I feel ready to get motoring with things again.

Gradually the emotional turmoil and mental repositioning we’ve had to put in place have become more manageable. And as the pressures have eased a little, I’ve been able to regain some control of my own time and routines. Hopefully, I will be able to get back to blogging on a more regular basis and continue the development of The Creative Instinct in terms of new resources, products and site development.’

And hopefully Lynda’s health will gradually improve enough for her to rediscover her own creative drive.’

Don’t Force It

Patience really is a virtue in these situations. Trying to force things along – deciding, for instance, that you should be feeling creative when it’s simply not there right now – well, that’s a recipe for frustration and unhappiness.

Make The Most Of It

I’ll leave you, I think, with this final thought. Please do make the most of your creative instincts now. Don’t put things off. Find a way of doing more of what you really want to do. And if you’ve been stopped in your tracks through whatever circumstances then don’t force things before you are ready. But if you feel your creativity beginning to stir, then do take a little time to reassess the barriers and see if you can’t knock a few of them down.

Wishing you health, peace and creativity – Andrew

***

See also the follow-up post:
Creativity and Illness – Victoria’s Good News Story
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Lynda started her own blog a few weeks back. You can read it here. It’s worth starting from the first posting.

Well, earlier this week I wrote a post entitled Creativity and Depression. A comment by Sari offered the other perspective on the subject. Among a number of interesting points Sari argued that media presentation and our own willingness (as creative people) to express ourselves skewed the perception towards that of the suffering artist. I’ve paraphrased heavily here, so Sari, I hope I’ve not misrepresented your stance.

The Creative Instinct Blog is all about achieving the joy and fulfilment that expressing creativity brings – but the focus does tend to be about the barriers and blocks that get in the way, and how to overcome them.

In fact the book I discussed in my previous post, The Van Gogh Blues, also argues that creative expression brings joy and meaning to our lives – it’s just that too many of us find our path to expression blocked.

That doesn’t always mean lots of suffering or depression- if family work and other interests are also meaningful. Many years ago (back in the late 70s!) I met many people who exemplified this. For a couple of years I worked as an ‘insurance man’. My job was to visit people in their homes to collect their insurance premiums and theoretically, sell them more insurance too. I was a young man and not a great insurance man. I never did sell enough new insurance and as I’ve always been fascinated by people my conversations with my customers often slowed collections down.

Senior Creatives

I found one type of customer was particularly interesting – the retired person who finally had chance to embrace their creativity. Most of them were painters – and very conventional painters at that – but wow, did they get joy from their art. These were men and women in the suburbs of Rotherham, an uncompromising steel and mining town (now ex-steel and mining) in Yorkshire, UK.

These happy people didn’t express regret at not being creative during their working life – just pride, enjoyment, enthusiasm and gratefulness. When I taught creative writing some years later I saw the same thing.

I suppose one frustration I felt on their behalf was that starting so late made it difficult for them to truly develop their undoubted abilities. That-s why I like to emphasise the need to use your creativity now, if you can. Paradoxically though, you might argue that beginning your creative life early and then being blocked by your other roles in life could be more frustrating (and depressing) than making a decision to leave your creativity for later in life.

Danger of Explosion

Well, I know that some people can put it to one side because I’ve met them – but many others simply can’t live with that. I’m one of them and so is my wife, Lynda. We both left school early and without any real ambitions to be creative, but as we grew into our twenties so did our creative needs. Eventually it wasn’t to be denied and if we hadn’t found an outlet for our creativity we’d have exploded.

Anyway, the point I’m making is that, as Sari points out – we should never forget that the personal outcome of expressing our creativity is joyful and wonderful, and we should tell that story too.

The Good Life is Boring?

Of course, another reason for the suffering artist image is our choice of creative subject matter: happiness and joy, fulfilment, a life of deep contentment and peace… yeah right… as if.  All that stuff is awesome to experience but often stupifyingly uninteresting to an audience – and more often than not it’s uninteresting to the creative practitioner too.

Lynda’s sculptures from a few years back are a good example – quite disturbing, even though Lynda herself has a marvellously sunny outlook on life. What she felt driven to express at that time came from the darker nooks and crannies of her soul and were always a surprise to those who thought they knew her. Conversely, for Lynda herself the expression of such dark material was the source of much joy and fulfilment.

It’s a complex relationship – but I guess the message comes back to Sari’s alternative perspective and the question – why are creatives so unbelievably happy & joyful & sane & optimistic?

Are we?

Stop Press – Creativity and Joyfulness!

It’s just turned 7am and I have this moment heard that my daughter has given birth to our second grandchild and first granddaughter! Mother and baby are doing fine. The labour was so quick that our son-in-law, Andy, made the delivery. What a rare privilege.

So how about that for Creativity and Joyfulness? And now we are off to see our new granddaughter!

I am very, very pleased to announce a free download exclusive to this site. How To Stop Being Your Own Worst Critic is designed to help combat that tendency in most creative people to be their own most damaging faultfinder. It’s an easy and quick 17-page read – including 7 powerful sequential techniques to blow those ‘worst critic’ tendencies out of the water.

A Long Time Coming

Good grief it’s taken some getting here. I actually started this part of my project back in August. Somehow the thing grew and grew and I ended up with an ebook (watch this space). However, I now also have the original free download I was aiming for. It might have taken me longer than I ever planned for, but I did end up with two things instead of one. So that’s alright then.

Even with my massive overwrite I still expected to complete by the end of November – but then the gods of Information Technology obviously got a bit cheesed off with the delay and decided to wade into the action themselves. Aarrgh!!!!

Luckily I am not a quitter. I persevered and my precious free download is now on the site and available to all. I hope you find if of value.

Download #2

I’ve also added another free download to the site – the wonderful How To Be Creative by Hugh Macleod. I really love this – it’s witty, succinct and full of amazing insights. Inspiring stuff. Thank you, Hugh, for making it available.

You can also visit Hugh’s own site by clicking the cartoon below.

Don’t forget to have a go at banishing your own worst critic – and if you know someone who would benefit from it, please tell them about the site.